I'm here.

I have been struggling with what to share in my first blog. It's been a week since I arrived, and so many things have happened since I landed. Maybe not tangible things, but things that I am still in the process of sorting through.

I am thankful for Rebecca's friendship, and Rodney and Cindy's help as I become a part of the "family." Biscuit did not welcome my presence, but she's getting used to me now and I LOVE having a dog in the family. She's a Rhodesian Ridgeback, and very noble. Noble and hates having her picture taken.

The tangible things that have happened since my arrival were the basic orientation of the house, chores, schedule. I've attended the church (La Vina, in Escazu) and the 20 - something's mid-week service. I've met several people in the community through "visiting," which will be a large part of the ministry here. I've gone with Becca to the kindergarten where she teaches an English class twice a week.

The intangible things that have and are still occurring are all the questions, the feelings of excitement and hope, mixed with fear. I constantly have to remind myself that God has prepared the way for me, and has gone before me. Becca reminded me of that about a week ago and that thought has been a huge source of comfort. Especially when I try to express myself in Spanish. My problem is that I don't want to try unless it's perfect, and I know it won't be. That's the lesson for myself...to be ok with less than perfect.

Rodney and I went down to the "quebrada" yesterday, which means the broken. The quebrada is a section of Los Anonos on the other side of the river where drug addicts hang out, deal drugs and do drugs. There are also families who live in the midst of it. There was a heavy feeling as we walked down the path, avoiding the mud and waste that littered the path. One person said to us, "cuidado" before we walked on our way...be careful. The quebrada evoked a feeling of hopelessness within me - wondering how people can come out of that lifestyle and how to have discipling when they do get out of it. I have to remind myself that there is something inside of everyone that yearns for the eternal, and there is a reason to hope. I pray that these people will see the reason and search for it, and allow others to help them out of it.

As I continue to become accustomed to Costa Rica and learning my role in Harvest Hands, I am certain that my times of discomfort and questioning are all part of the process. And thankfully God is helping me, daily, to have a desire to learn, serve and do my best, even when my best is not perfect.